Poultrygeist: Night Of The Chicken Dead (2006)

Poultrygiest is the story of a young man who gets a job at a new fast food restraunt, however the fast food joint is actually built on an old Indian burial ground and now the spirits are angry and out for revenge. The owner of the restaurant is of course in denial about the whole thing. Once his employees and others start continuously dying from horrible chicken related fatalities, will he remain in denial or believe in the undead? The young and newest employee must fend off the undead, protect others and get back the girl of his dreams. Can he do it, will he succeed or will he fail miserably? Find out all this and more in Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead.

My personal opinion on the movie was, well I liked it and was impressed. I was a little confused at first about the story line but as the movie went on I understood it more. It's also a musical you might not ever want to see again however. I found it both hilarious and entertaining. I felt there wasn’t enough blood or nudity, which are two main things that make a horror movie. In my opinion it was never meant to be a horror movie but an entertaining comedy instead. So I would in fact recommend this movie, not for horror fanatics but for someone who needs a good laugh.

Kill Me Or Let Me Go (2009)

This time we are going to be looking at Kill Me Or Let Me Go from Benjamin Baker. First off the DVD is actually three short films with Kill Me of course but it also contains The Abduction Of Rookie Rynard and The Vampires Of Grim Lake. Kill Me Or Let Me Go is only thirteen minutes long and I really wish it was more. At least a half hour would be nice. The movie is broken up into four titles that are chess themed off of the character's name. For example knight takes bishop is the start and it's because the character James Earl Bishop is being taken to his execution by a guy named... you guessed it Knight. Once there he gets to choose how he wants to die but that all comes to a halt when a random alarm is sounded and everyone gets out of the area as fast as they can leaving Bishop to discover what it is they were running from. A couple minutes later we enter the Queen's chapter which again you probably guessed involves someone named Queen.
But ha ha your wrong. It's actually just three chicks tied up in the basement and gagged in lingerie. One of them happens to be the very attractive Erin Chaney (co-writer/producer). So with that said I know we are all going to go buy it so I will take a minute and let you go to the website to buy it.


Ok this is actually the best part and not just because of the obvious. Enter a guy named Rookie and picture this: he is a pretty heavy set guy who loves to drink his moonshine with his jean jacket open and his no shirt gut hanging out and terrifying the girls he has captured. He's also badass with a harmonica. Yes I said it, a harmonica and he can play it and he does so. He breaks out with a blues vibe sound and starts singing to the girls how he is going to kill them. "Gonna kill me some bitches" he sings straight to the point. The girls, crying and scared, sing back "kill me or let me go" which kind of sounds like a KMFDM song. You know what the film is called because people about to die like to say that phrase. So the song goes on and I am interested in the soundtrack at this point. I won't give too much more away but seriously it's worth checking. Not just because a chick who co-wrote the story agreed to have her and two friends tied up in lingerie on the floor. I had to add that again in case anyone was sleeping the first time. Ok now onto the Abduction Of Rookie and yes it's the same guy who played the harmonica and sang so I was interested from the start. This time we get to see him making his family's special moonshine. He goes through explaining the steps, sips on some to make sure it's right and about now he is pretty spaced out and see's a talking puppet that he calls his dad. He starts arguing with it and walks outside then gets attacked by alien. I'll give you a minute to analyze that. It's only three minutes long but worth a watch even if you hate puppets that argue with you. Check it out.

Vampires Of Grim Lake is a little different for me and not really my thing. First off I will say that it's filmed with an old film style and look that I thought was pretty cool. The killing always has some death metal playing while it's done so that can be hit or miss for you. After killing an old guy on a boat, who I am guessing must have been an acid head, the vampires begin to trip in a blue light and bubble sequence. That leads to some talking between the two vampires which sounds more like a wrestling match than normal talk. Fast forward and you see the vampires killing some other vampires which is witnessed by the "Chuck Norris" of the film who goes home to put on his war paint and begins some Rambo style crossbow killing. Over all check this collection out. Vampires Of Grim Lake may or may not be for you but I highly recommend the other two films. If you like low budget films or want to be the first to own these movies which will be talked about for years to come head over to Bake Productions and get the DVD.

Farewell for now...

Review by Joe

Luther The Geek (1990)

A geek is a carnival performer whose show consists of bizarre acts, such as biting the head off a live chicken. Luther takes things a bit further and uses his razor-sharp metal dentures to bite the necks of humans. As a child he witnessed a geek locked in a cage bite the head off a chicken for the amusement of the townsfolk. Amazed by this ghastly act he is never the same again. Thirty years later after being imprisoned for committing a series of grisly murders Luther is out on parole. The first place he goes is the local super market where he eats some raw eggs and steels a pair of sunglasses. The manager calls the police and chases him out of the store where he attacks an old woman and kills her. A cop shows up and Luther hides in the backseat of a woman's car. The woman drives home to her isolated farmhouse with Luther in the back, unbeknownst to her.

The rest of the film consists of Luther terrorizing the woman, her daughter and her daughter's boyfriend. There is a decent amount of gore in the film. We get to see multiple scenes of neck biting, a disembowelment, a shotgun blast to the chest and more. Another thing to point out is that Luther never talks, he just clucks like a chicken. I thought this worked well for the film and added a creepy element to the character. This review wouldn't be complete without mentioning the babe who plays the daughter. This chick has the most awesome rack ever and we see it displayed in all it's glory during her shower scene. If nothing else you should watch the movie for this reason alone. Luther The Geek is a very entertaining movie filled with gore, nudity and suspense. It's a shame it was so overlooked and stayed under the radar for so long. I loved the movie and I would suggest any horror fan buy a copy. You won't be dissapointed.

Review by Brad

Buy Luther The Geek on DVD

The Janitor (2005)

I thought the movie had a great plot and the idea of having a janitor as the center piece of the murders was a little strange but also a fresh new idea as far as a serial killer is concerned. I also felt that the deaths were both comical and creative such as when the gentleman was duct taped to a chair and gasoline was poured on him and then set ablaze and when the guy was killed with a plunger in a less then satisfying way. I felt there could have been a tad more gore in the movie and also a tad more nudity because it seems the movie is set more towards laughter then to terrify the audience.

Overall I felt it was a pretty satisfying movie. It didn’t quite satisfy my horror needs but did satisfy my comical needs. Just to sum up the movie, it's the story of a janitor that works in an office building who wants more in life than to pick up after other people and be laughed at and teased by his fellow employees. So he goes on a murderous rampage that ends up at a sorority house and he's not alone. Find out what happens in this thrilling yet hilarious film and you'll never look at a janitor the same way again.

Review by Chris

Buy The Janitor on DVD

Bitten (2010)

Bitten is the story of a man who is looking for the right girl after so many others have turned out to not be it. There's just two problems with that. First the man searching for the sweet lady is Jason Mewes, who if you don't know is Jay from Jay and Silent Bob. Second, the lovely lady he meets turns out to be just a little different. Yeah you guessed it, she is a vampire. He can't decide what he should do.The movie stays true to anything that has had Jason in it. Non-stop fuck this and that. In fact I believe the fourth word in the movie was fuck. The film also struggles to decide what type it wants to be. From somewhat horror, to a cheesy comedy, to a black comedy with even more bad casting and acting choices.

Frostbiter: Wrath Of The Wendigo (1995)

Frostbiter: Wrath Of The Wendigo borrows a lot from Evil Dead. An ancient evil is unearthed on a remote island and terrorizes a group of stranded hunters stuck in a cabin. In one scene there is even an Evil Dead 2 poster in the background. That being said, I really enjoyed the movie. It's full of action, gore and humor to keep your interest. There's a lot of cool creatures running around wreaking havoc. You get a possessed pot of chili that eats a guy's hand, a topless babe who turns into a witch, zombie hunters, a flying monster that bites a dudes head off and a stop motion wendigo. I liked the effects even though they were cheesy and far from great.

There is so much going on it's hard to become bored. Don't forget about the aforementioned pair of boobs that are bared for your viewing pleasure. The soundtrack is full of crazy music by Ron Asheton (who also stars in it), Elvis Hitler and The New Breed Beboo Society. During one scene when the chili monsters are attacking the hunters a ridiculous song about chili plays in the background. I loved it and it's things like this that make the film unique. All in all Frostbiter stands on it's own and comes across as an homage to Evil Dead instead of a rip off.

Review by Brad

Buy Frostbiter: Wrath Of The Wendigo on DVD

It's Alive!

Welcome boils and ghouls! Revolting Reviews is a blog designed by horror fans for horror fans. Each week we will post a new movie review for your reading pleasure. These reviews are intended to tell the reader a little bit about the film and whether or not he or she should seek it out or steer clear of it. We love bad movies, but there is a difference between so bad it's good and so bad it's horrible. We hope you enjoy our blog and we look forward to saving hours of your life from being wasted away watching god-awful movies.

Cheers,
Brad, Joe and Chris